Sunday, March 29, 2009

Why Malibu is cool


I saw this newsflash today:

MALIBU, Calif. (AP) ―Authorities said hikers discovered human skeletal remains in a car that had apparently tumbled down a chasm into the mountains above Malibu.

Los Angeles Sheriff's Detective Gary Sica said the hikers found the car pointing nose-down about 800 feet below a heavily trafficked section of a winding canyon road on Sunday.

National Park Service Ranger James Herbaught said the car was covered by brush and was not visible to helicopters that routinely patrol the canyons for fallen vehicles. He says the hikers saw something glinting in the sun while hiking a nearby popular trail and went to investigate.

The Los Angeles County Coroner's Office is expected to identity the remains by Tuesday.

Sadly, when they announce the identity of this guy or lady it probably will be the highlight of my week.

I love how in the year 2009, you can fall off a mountain in a car in one of the most traveled, wealthy places on Earth and not be found for a very long time.
I feel bad that someone had to go out like that, but I think it's pretty fucking cool.
It's like hiking in Runyon Canyon (a popular dog park near my parent's house) and finding skeletons of a man and dog in a bush which had been there since 1874.

I am irritated they didn't mention the make of the car. Was it a T-Model Ford? A Camero? A souped up Honda? Was the skeleton still gripping a cell phone? a monocle?
If it was a monocle how did it not break on impact? Sometimes this stuff makes me wish I was forensics dude for the police.

This reminds me when a kooky lady I knew in N.Y. had a Halloween Party and thought it would be fun to have a 'scary story' time featuring a forensic detective. He told a story of how they found a headless body in a Brooklyn gutter and how he solved the crime. I remember how this retired, grinning, civil servant told the story in a lackadaisical manner——the same kind of way a doctor would tell a goofy story from his med school days when he dropped a heart he removed from a cadaver (oops!)— and when he got to the headless part of his goulish story, he grossed out the entire room—and not in a good way. It didn't help that the kooky hostess was like "YAY!!!" when he finished.

But back to the case of the Malibu skeleton. If they do positively identify the remains I hope it's someone with a good back story, like Jimmy Hoffa. Knotty will keep you posted...

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